Thursday, August 21, 2008

Lottlympiad Medal Controversy!

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Bob: Welcome to the second Lottlympiad update. There's been a flurry of activity, and very little sleep in the past nine days. To catch us up to date, let's go live to Al, Tim and Elfie.

Al: Thank you, Bob. We're coming to you live from the LottLoft, with a breaking controversy over medal award levels here in the Peacock Dressage.

Tim: That's right, Al. The stated Bronze medal level for the Peacock Dressage was to complete the top part. But now we hear that the Silver medal has been given out for reaching this level!

Al: How could this happen? Elfie?

Elfie: Well, Al, it seems that our stitcher has had most of the Bronze level complete for days and days. However, with lighting conditions being what they are...

Tim: It's shocking, really.

Elfie: ...the last step, the beads, could not be applied until daylight hours were available.

Al: And we all know what's important in beading.

Tim: You've got to stick it, Al. Stick and stab.

Elfie: But the sticking is the most important part.

Tim: That's right, Elfie.

Al: But how did this result in the Silver medal being issued?

Elfie: It turns out that the stitcher poured out some beads, and when the beading was complete, she had poured out the exact number needed!

Tim: Wow.

Al: No more, no less?

Elfie: No more, no less.

Tim: WOW.

Al: So the Head Judge suggested that this was a performance worthy of the Silver medal. I guess that's the Home Field Advantage coming through. We've seen it time and again. So let's take a look at the results...

Tim: WOW!

Elfie: This work has exactly the kind of quality we all look for.

Al: Such as?

Elfie: Qualities that define quality work.

Tim: Absolutely!

Elfie: And you have to stick it.

Tim: Yes, otherwise that is a one-tenth deduc--

Al: We've also reached the Bronze medal level in Synchronized Shawling.

Tim: WOW!! Just look at the match we have here! It's like we're looking at one side of a shawl, twice!

Al: Except one side has way more done.

Tim: Of course, there's a little deduction there.

Elfie: There have been allegations that this matching wouldn't have been possible without a little "adjustment" on the start date.

Al: Decide for yourself. Is it possible that two skeins could start at exactly the same place?

Tim: Let's just all remember that equipment preparation prior to eventing is perfectly acceptable. For instance, winding part of a skein off in the car on the way to work in the morning when you're too brain-dead to do anything else...that's not cheating. And, anyway, there was definitely some over-achieving in the Bronze category of the Tubey Tornado.

Elfie: Yes. I was told that when the medal levels were set, it was thought that fewer stripes were done than actually were. But rather than count those ahead to the medal, the correct number of stripes were actually knitted. So this is definitely a Silver medal performance.

Tim: Wow. What's up with the sides there?

Al: To the uneducated viewer, it looks like that was meant to be waist decreasing.

Elfie: Oh, my. That step out of bounds is a one-tenth deduc--

Al: Well, that's all from here. There has also been a report of a Bronze and Silver in the Bead Relay, but we don't have a photo finish yet.

Bronze in Synchronized Shawling, Silver in Bead Relay, Silver in Peacock Dressage, and Silver in the Tubey Tornado!! And if you haven't watched as much gymnastics as I have over the past week, you probably didn't get any of that...sorry. =)


Erin (moviemuse) said...

ROTFL!! Go Heather!

Annette said...

Please, no more controversy! I say steal the goal and be done :)

(I've posted you an "I Love Your Blog" award tonight)

Shanta Hayes said...

Challenge on the medal. The judges would like to see the slow motion replay of the exact number of beads being poured out.
I loved that slow motion, especially in diving. WOW! I did watch plenty of gymnastics, and swimming, and track and field (what a hard time that was). Congratulations on all the medals, and in case you didn't already know - You really know how to make a girl laugh.

Jill said...

Some Stro-motion footage really would have helped the home viewer decide on the medal controversy. And one thing we really hadn't seen so far...was Heather sticking it. It came just when you needed it the most!

I hope that there's a final recap, these are so enjoyable!

imnverted said...

Love your Olympic Commentary!

I also posted a blog award for you :o)

imnverted said...

Love your Olympic Commentary!

I also posted a blog award for you :o)

Jean in Georgia said...

I applaud your effort through my personal Olympic boycott. :)

TeresaB said...

I see that the medal controversy continues. I even heard there might be an investigation by the international stitching sanctioning body. But that may be just a rumor as I understand they are all too busy preparing for an upcoming synchronized stitching event that is expected to take months.

Congratulations on your accomplishments! You did much better then me.

Ina said...

Great job! I thoroughly enjoyed the Lottlympiad. I finished a piece during the closing ceremonies myself! Hope to see you guys at GTVB this weekend.

Anonymous said...

This is a hoot. I've been absent...and am just now catching up. What creativity...what accomplishment...what...what...words just escape me, but thanks for the big huge grin spread all over my face!
Beautiful work!

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